Six Months

Last week marked six months since we began this leukemia journey.  In some ways, it seems like it has been an eternity, but mostly I can't believe it has been HALF A YEAR!!  We still have about three months until we are finished with the worst part of his treatment and almost three years until all his treatment is completed.

In many ways, I feel like we were dumped on another planet. There is very little about our lives that is the same as it was before Derek's diagnosis. We have been forced to accept uncertainty, to live each day with the realization that something unexpected could happen, to walk on, though we frequently do not know how to do it or where we the path will lead next. What makes the journey bearable is the knowledge that nothing takes God by surprise and the assurance that He is with us always.

Things I am learning: (Some of them are much easier said than done.)

• When Jesus said we should be like little children, I think He said "little" on purpose.  Little children do not worry about the future. They live for now.  If they feel good, they play; if they don't, they take a nap. I can take one step at a time, and I do not have to worry about the future.  I don't know what will happen tomorrow anyway.
• Anything can happen, and something probably will. I can keep going.
• Not all promises in the Bible are for now. They are still the promises of God, even if they don't happen just when I would like them.  An ultimate fulfillment is even better than getting it right now.  I can claim them still.
• There are Bible promises for now. I can trust God to keep them.
• Though my road has been rough and filled with heartache, there are many others with far rockier journeys than mine and with far more heartache. I look forward to the end of these journeys, and I am thankful this world is not our home.  
• I have more friends than I can count, some of whom I have never met. I look forward to heaven.